we all have something to share about taxis in Uganda unless your dad resides at the state house and you happened to be conceived after 86. well i have used matatus all my life and it was only until recently that i had graduated from matatus and used to cruise to my destinations behind the wheels in the comfort of my own given car. while at the university i was privileged to be among the not very many campusers who drove to class then hostel, it was goo, fast forward work or call it employment all the benefits of being a child disappeared, now i have to pay my bills, work for my food you can think god was doing it all over again to Adam and eve, trust me now i know how they felt upon leaving Eden. any way with this new adult life the car being owned by the big guy had to go as i exited his gates. i was back to zero and definitely had to go back to my old buddies those guys you all love to call conductors, i had to use once again the taxi park and endure the jam because now i moved with other fourteen passengers. the adjustment to my new life has been hard can you imagine sitting in a car for thirty minutes waiting for it to get filled, the pain of having the car stop every after 4 minutes to ask pedestrians clearly not looking like they are going some anywhere.then having the guy drive like crazy as though he has finally realized that he has not only helped you waste an hour but he has gotten you late for work. these matatus are really inconveniencing and uncomfortable but what is worse are those stage guides who call out for pedestrians and ask for 200 hundred shs and wont budge until they are paid even if when u stopped the conductor did the job by himself (forgive the masculinity personally i have not encountered any females in this business), these suckers like i always inaudibly call them can even stop you from using a give taxi just because it has defaulted on paying for using that stage, the goon even slammed the door in my face as i tried to board one forcefully you could think he was going to pay for or that he actually owned me. my lamenting could go on and on... now as for my matatu, its a special one OK they are many but all the same, they are so unique you can only access them from the nakawa taxi park. they are so old that their registration plate s range between UPK and the newest i think is the new formatted UAG. they are so unique that their coat of paint is peeling, they have no stereos, and their speed doesn't go beyond 50km/hr and as you go to Luzira this speed tremendously goes down to i think 10km/hr as you go up the slope around Akamwesi hostel you even fear that it could fail to go further and instead stop and start declining. they are so professional where by every passenger is asked not to board if their payment will involve exchanging notes of more than 5k, such passengers are asked to first get change or cash in with the conductor immediately to enable him break it down. the passengers are another interesting lot as this group of sapiens includes old women who give/ create demand for makers of bleaching substance, i guess you can now picture how they look like if you know what i mean, these be travelling to kintitale market so the stop over for them to disembark will cost u another 15 mins and by now those of us going to offices are dying with fury. these ladies are not only annoying they are bold too with one seated next to you she will ask you to help carry some of her merchadise not respecting your lous vitton neck tie and well polished clarks as she will spill some of the nakati on you and trample all ofver you feet as she gets her hugely exaggerated behind out of the matatu. the other lot is usually travelling to port bell and these will eat anything they can buy (one wonders if they actually save!) they will eat boiled eggs, bananas, roasted and boiled maize so if one actually farted you the corporate passanger will think that actually this earth has fury worse than hell. allow me to tell you about their conversation which is usually loud and interjected with loud clamours call it laughing, obscenities and definately men oh they also discuss these popular telenovelas so when i hear the chics at work discussing these soaps which even these mothers of mine can comprehend then i think the plot is way below me. so 3 mins to 8am i disembark off the matatu and rush to work to beat arrival time and wait for yet another painful ride on my matatu the following morning. where the stage guide will be calling out to those going to kitintale,bell, luzira, miami beach yes you read right MIAMI beach in Luzira if you ever dared to go it the repercussion of your visit please dont blame the writer.
